1.  Word processors never display a cursor.

2.  You never have to use the spacebar when typing long sentences.

3.  All monitors display 2 inch high letters.

4.  High-tech computers, such as those used by NASA, the CIA, or
    some such governmental institution, have easy-to-understand
    graphical interfaces.

5.  Those that don't will have incredibly powerful text-based
    command shells that can correctly understand and execute
    commands typed in plain English.

6.  Corollary: You can gain access to any information you want by
    simply typing "ACCESS ALL OF THE SECRET FILES" on any keyboard.

7.  Likewise, you can infect a computer with a destructive virus
    by simply typing "UPLOAD VIRUS."  Viruses cause temperatures in
    computers, just like they do in humans.  After a while, smoke
    billows out of disk drives and monitors.

8.  All computers are connected. You can access the information on
    the villain's desktop computer, even if it's turned off.

9.  Powerful computers beep whenever you press a key or whenever
    the screen changes. Some computers also slow down the output on
    the screen so that it doesn't go faster than you can read. The
    *really* advanced ones also emulate the sound of a dot-matrix
    printer as the characters come across the screen.

10.  All computer panels have thousands of volts and flash pots
     just underneath the surface. Malfunctions are indicated by a
     bright flash, a puff of smoke, a shower of sparks, and an
     explosion that forces you backward. See #7, above)

11.  People typing away on a computer will turn it off without
     saving the data.

12.  A hacker can get into the most sensitive computer in the
     world before intermission and guess the secret password in
     two tries.

13.  Any PERMISSION DENIED has an OVERRIDE function.

14.  Complex calculations and loading of huge amounts of data will
     be accomplished in under three seconds. In the movies,
     modems transmit data at two gigabytes per second.

15.  When the power plant/missile site/whatever overheats, all the
     control panels will explode, as will the entire building.

16.  If you display a file on the screen and someone deletes the
     file,it also disappears from the screen.  There are no ways
     to copy a backup file-and there are no undelete utilities.

17.  If a disk has got encrypted files, you are automatically
     asked for a password when you try to access it.

18.  No matter what kind of computer disk it is, it'll be readable
     by any system you put it into.  All application software is
     usable by all computer platforms.

19.  The more high-tech the equipment, the more buttons it has.
     However, everyone must have been highly trained, because
     the buttons aren't labelled.

20.  Most computers, no matter how small, have reality-defying
     three-dimensional, real-time, photo-realistic animated graphics
     capability.

21.  Laptops, for some strange reason, always seem to have amazing
     real-time video phone capabilities and the performance of a
     CRAY- MP.

22.  Whenever a character looks at a VDU, the image is so bright
     that it projects itself onto his/her face.

23.  Computers never crash during key, high-intensity activities.
     Humans operating computers never make mistakes under stress.

24.  Programs are fiendishly perfect and never have bugs that slow
     down users.

25.  Any photograph can have minute details pulled out of it.
     You can zoom into any picture as far as you want to.  For
     example:

     "What's that fuzzy thing in the corner?  I don't know, let's
     check.

     It's the murder weapon!".  "Let's look under the bed for the
     killers shoes.  no, just some comics books (Marvel 1954, very
     rare).  Let's check the closet shelves..."